In Illinois, parenting time (formerly known as visitation) refers to the amount of time a child spends with each parent following a divorce or separation. This can be one of the more angst-inducing aspects of the parental agreement in a high-conflict divorce, as well as ones in which there are differences of opinion regarding where the child should live.
What parents don’t often anticipate is what they will do when their child asks to have a say in the agreement – or to alter one after the divorce is settled. It does happen, more often than you may think. And while it can be difficult if you’re the parent the child wants less time with, there are many considerations to think through before it becomes a reality.
How Does Parenting Time Usually Work in Illinois?
After a divorce, the court focuses on the child’s best interests when determining parenting time arrangements. Generally, it aims to ensure that the child maintains a meaningful relationship with both parents, except for cases in which it would not be safe or beneficial for the child. So, what you can usually expect:
- The state will encourage you to develop a parenting plan together, outlining time-sharing details, decision-making responsibilities, and other relevant issues.
- If both parents can’t agree, the court may intervene and create a schedule for you.
- In situations where there’s a concern for the child’s safety, such as in cases of abuse or neglect, the court may limit or supervise parenting time.
Why Would a Child Request More Time with One Parent?
Kids sometimes request more time with one parent after a divorce for a variety of reasons. It might be that they have a closer emotional bond with one parent. It might simply be a desire for stability and consistency, or because they feel more comfortable in that parent’s home environment. In other cases, a child may also be influenced by factors like feeling more understood, having a preference for one parent’s routines, or wanting to avoid conflict between the parents.
It does not mean that you are a bad parent or that your child doesn’t love you. Sometimes children change their mind, as well. If yours has brought up the subject, try not to react defensively. Insead, talk to them to get to the root of why they are making the request so you can decide if any actions should be taken next.
When Do Children Have a Say Legally Over Parenting Time?
In Illinois, children can have a say in their parenting time arrangements, but it depends on their age, maturity, and the specific circumstances of the case. They are generally not given an automatic right to choose which parent they want to live with. However, under state law, the court can consider a child’s preferences if they are deemed mature enough to express a reasoned opinion.
Typically, Illinois courts give more weight to a child’s wishes if they are around 14 years old or older, although younger children may also be heard, depending on their ability to communicate their feelings and preferences. The court will assess whether the child’s input is in their best interest, alongside factors such as:
- The child’s relationship with both parents;
- Their mental and emotional well-being; and
- The parents’ ability to provide a stable environment.
When Will Courts Disregard a Child’s Preferences?
Even if children are given a chance to voice their preferences, they generally do not have the final say in determining parenting time. The courts tend to prioritize the child’s best interests over their personal desires, and the judge will ultimately decide what arrangement serves the child’s overall welfare. In cases where the child’s preferences seem to be influenced by one parent or are not in line with what is best for their development, the court may disregard or give little weight to their request.
In some cases, a child may wish to live with the parent who lives far away. If so, the court must also consider the feasibility of maintaining a meaningful relationship with both parents, as well as the impact of the distance on the child’s well-being before making a decision.
Call the Family Law Office of David A. King to Discuss Parenting Time
Three things you can do if the topic comes up:
- Maintain open communication with your child.
- Consider discussing the issue with your ex.
- Consider what will happen if you honor their request – particularly, how it could affect your child’s life.
- Talk to a family law attorney who has overseen cases in which there were differences of opinions over parenting time.
Contact the Law Office of David A. King, P.C. for a free consultation on concerns you have over parenting time in your divorce.
